BAD DAY

Had a really bad day at work yesterday.
Having been in this line for nearly 7 years now, I thought that I have taken enough shit to become zen.

Apparently not.

Unreasonable and rude traders... that i can handle
Unreasonable and rude sales... that i can handle
Unreasonable and rude clients... that i can handle (because customers are always right!)

But apparently i cannot handle an unreasonable boss.

Lost my cool at my boss yesterday.

That's right.

Right in the middle of the trading floor.
And things got so bad that she dragged me into a meeting room to "talk it out".

Yup, there goes my promotion and there goes my pay rise and probably the end of my career here.
But you know what?

No regrets.

Because i stood up for what i believe in and i would not have done it any other way.


*************The Story behind if anyone is interested***************

So there was an issue at work where my team had to handle.
Where was the boss?
She was doing her disappearing act as usual and nowhere to be found.
( For the record, she is hardly at her desk and nobody knows where she is most of the time)

So my team handled it and i felt that what we did was correct.
(Sidenote: the root cause of the problem was not caused by my team)

But there is another stakeholder lets call him Mr Cocky (a Director Level Ang mo) who intervened and used very sarcastic tone throughout to insinuate that my team did not do our due diligence.

He said things like

" Pick up the phone and talk to each other guys, sending emails are just not the most efficient way of resolving issues"
(when we already did that)

" There's something called the mobile folks"

Yup there you go, that is the shit that i have to take everyday.
It's fine right, i have been in this line for so many years, i can take his sarcasm and his shit.
But when he is wrong, i feel i have to be firm and defend my team. (in the absence of a disappearing boss)

So basically i stood up against him for my team and stated very factually that what he expected was not part of our responsibilities. In the most non-sarcastic manner ever. I swear, it was only very factual.

And apparently Mr Cocky was unhappy with my reply and escalated this to my global big boss with this one liner email (without my knowledge at all)...

" ARE YOU SERIOUSLY KIDDING ME?"

Sidenote: Dear mr cocky, if you disagree with me, you should have the balls to come to talk to me directly.
(He is so hypocritical right? He sniped on me to my big boss and pretended nothing happened and requested for me to do stuff for him the next day. While i was ignorant about being backstabbed at. YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. No more favours for you Mr Cocky, and your requests will be on the lowest priority from now on, mark my words)

So my boss - the magician with the disappearing act- missed all the emails (even though she was copied in) was suddenly made to talk to Mr Cocky about this issue. So naturally, Mr Cocky complained about my attitude. And guess what, without finding out about what happened or checking with me or anyone else in the team, this ignorant boss of mine immediately jumped to the conclusion that I WAS IN THE WRONG and apologised to Mr Cocky. And the minute she came back to the desk, she said " You should not have sent that email to Mr cocky. Why did we not do xxx (the thing that mr cocky wanted us to do)? We should have done that. Blah blah blah. Is there anywhere that states that we are not supposed to do this?"

Imagine.
After one hard day at work (akin to fighting a war), your boss comes and reprimand you without finding out what went wrong.
I have had enough right?
Hello?
I do shit for you.
I handle all the tough questions for you.
I run the team for you.
I fight the war everyday.

What do you do?
You disappear
and you talk.

Thats all.

Fine if you don't help us to do our BAU right?
We don't need you, i can handle it, i can resolve things on my own.
But now - the least bit you can do, is to stand up for your own bloody team.

Alright so i exploded.
Right there and then.
I was still reasonable. I did not complain about her at all.
All i did was to argue on how this issue was handled, and reasoned why we should not and cannot do xxx.

Then, she read through the email chain of issues.
(P.S: Ya, she didnt even read first before apologising to Mr Cocky and saying that its my fault and coming back to reprimand me)

And then she dragged me into a room to talk things out.

And things got even more exciting.

In the room, she told me that she agrees with me and the problem was my tone in the email.
Because the recipient is Mr Cocky Full of Himself, so i cannot use such a harsh, sarcastic and negative tone to him. I should have been positive instead and throw the problem back at him in another manner.

**BREATHE**

Let me quote you some of the fantastic phrases she used

"He is Front Office. We are support, and the mentality is that WE ARE HERE TO SERVE"
"You cannot use this tone on him because like it or not, YOU ARE NOT HIS PEER. Me & Mr. abc (both VP Levels) can use this tone because we are his peers)
"You cannot draw a line so clearly like that because you are building walls"

**BREATHE**

Wow if it is so hierarchical then i might as well join the govt sector.
We are a huge global bank right?
What century are you living in please, are you still having the colonial mentality?

Please hor please, so what if he is a fucking ang mo director.
If i am right i will say as i deem fit ok.

and the best part is, i was not even sarcastic at all. My email was cordial and factual.

So the conclusion is

Mr Cocky Ang Mo Director cannot take it that a lowly associate asian girl draws the line clearly with him.
Because all these are to be taken up on a "higher level".

You are expected to work like a slave.
Long hours.
Do as you are told.
Higher management are always right.
Do not talk back.
Suck it up.

Isn't it a joke?

Separately, I escalated this to Mr abc - another of my global ang mo boss (not the one Mr Cocky complained to) and he actually replied me

" Totally agree with you. Let me know if Mr Cocky disagrees"

So i told my local boss. Even this global boss agrees with me. Why don't you forward this complain email to him to handle?

Guess what she said

" NO. I do not want to involve him. He will only incite Mr Cocky further. I want to close off this issue quietly."

There you go.

Because i have this asian chinese woman boss with a colonial mentality.

I will be made the scapegoat.
Even though i am right.

T.T

*************End of Story******************


So this incident got me thinking about foreigners here.
Specifically highly paid Ang Mo foreigners that are hired here.

How many of them actually bother to integrate into our culture?

Let me share with you some of the stuff i have encountered:

1. I know of one who refuses to eat chinese food.
Never eaten at lau pat sat, not even at chinese restaurants.
What a joke right? He declines to go for client dinners because - get this- he cannot eat chinese food.
Errr.. if you tell me you don't eat lamb or meat or veggie or spicy food, whatever, i understand.

But CHINESE FOOD on the whole?

Hello mr small minded pea brain, there are many kinds of chinese food ok. spicy non spicy etc.
You can only eat burgers and fries ah?

I have never heard of something called allergy to Chinese food. Is there even a scientific term for this?

2. They treat Singapore as a jumping stone, fly in here to manage ppl for one or 2 years and then go back to their own country with an even higher title. (I know countless people who are like that)

3. They do not know where the real Singapore heartlands are, and only hang out with their own kind.
Places they hangout include:
Bars and pubs along boat quay/ cbd areas
Stay at east coast / robertson walk
Restaurants at Duxton hill / Club Street

I tell them.. I live in Bishan. They give me a blank look. Wheres that? Which MRT line?

lolxxx

Hello!?!? One of the most popular heartland area in Singapore?

4. One has been here for almost a year already and doesn't know that the ESPLANADE is called the esplanade. "Oh, the building that has spikes?"

5. I know of this angmo director who obviously earns big bucks.. but donates coins in a charity drive.
I am not kidding. I saw it with my own eyes.

Yes i was aghast.

Believe me, if i compile all the ridiculous stories that i heard, i can publish a book already.

But thats the way the world is.

They are supposedly the "smarter better" leaders so they are paid big bucks to come here.
No one is going to stay here long term.
No one is going to make this place their home.
Some will apply for PRs but others will not even bother.

To them, its a mentality of " Suffer in Singapore" for a couple of years and go back as a hero.

lol but of course when they "suffer in singapore" they are actually leading the high life.

The life that most of us heartlanders cannot afford.

I have had a dinner with these people where they went to a fine dining restaurant, drank 3 bottles of red wine and ate steaks. Bill was like 1k+? For 6 ppl. Yup. and it was charged to the company, not a single cent from their own pocket.

Amazing right?
I wanted to scream at them, and say OMG IF YOU ARE GOING TO SPEND THE MONEY ON FOOD LIKE THAT, SHOULDN'T YOU PAY ME BETTER!??!

i havent had a pay rise in four fucking years.
and i have to buy my own stationery at work.

pathetic right?

But thats the way it is.

because they are superior leaders that i must never talk back to.